So, you might be wondering what the
hell am I doing here, the truth is, with all honesty, I have no idea, and
because I am horrible at speaking publically and all of this stuff, don’t
expect anything good here. I’m sure we would all imagine that the reason for
somebody to be in front of all of you in a day like this day, is because they
are either the principal, and inspirational dude who has a lot of inspirational
speech things to say, some other important person from the faculty, or of
course the valedictorian or the salutatorian or whatever other –torian persons
exist. Clearly I am none of those so I am just as confused as you are and well
nervous, lets just get over it.
Unfinished. As I was watching
another How I Met Your Mother episode for the hundredth time yesterday, because
you know, Netflix, I came upon the word unfinished, and realized how unfinished
everything is. Even though most of us already want to get out of this
perpetuating and time consuming jail of a jungle, just kidding we all love it
here right. No but really, even though most of us want to get out of here, the
uncertainty that follows, the mystery of what is to come, in relativity with
the past, what we have lived through already, it is all unfinished. I’m not
necessarily talking about those essays we never really finished, or those
senior activities nobody paid for, so never happened. I’m not talking about
supposedly going to the gym, or completing those social service hours. I’m not
talking about the physics or calc exams, or those classroom without walls trips
we never attended to, thank you for that btw, the replacement military camp,
awesome, and that place, Multiparque, or Camelot, or whatever its name was,
awesome too, I mean all those closed rides where a hell of a lot of fun. I am
talking about our lives. I am sure we all want to go back to the bottom of the
school, to primary and rub poop all over everyone’s faces, eat everything, and
I mean everything I clearly recall grass tasted somewhat like spinach, it
wasn’t that bad actually. Or having that wannabe sand under our clothes while
playing in that elephant which by the way, has no relation whatsoever to the
school, I mean who decided that an elephant with a pointless whole in the
middle was going to be representative of out school. Wasn’t the condor supposed
to be the school mascot? Although actually that doesn’t really represent the
school either seeing as we never really celebrate the condor in any sports
event or competition. The school just decided to put it in with some other
animals and make a jungle out of it, I mean a condor a hawk an eagle, a falcon,
then came the ridiculous osprey we all hated, and well the all famous elephant.
Lets not forget those torturing shows teachers made us do each year and perform
to parent who always with no fault brought they ridiculously big filming
cameras. I mean it was as if our teacher just wanted to have some fun with us
little inoffensive kids, putting these big ass ridiculous costumes, full of overwhelming
feathers, fake fur or slightly inappropriate dancing outfits. If you think
about it, like really think about it,
it was kind of infant abuse. What I’m saying is, even though our childhood did
have certain bizarre moments, we all want it, and would love to keep on living
that simplistic life constantly depending on our parents, and our teachers. I
am sure all of us here at least once peed their pants at primary school, probably
even elementary school, and why cant we do that now, it was awesome not having
to go all the way to the bathroom at the other side of the class so far away, instead
just pee where you were, then easily change to brand new clothes, ok now that I
say it out loud, probably nobody will really
miss that. What I am trying to say is this: our childhood is unfinished, it
will always be, and even though we passed through it a long time ago, and even
though most of us would probably say that we prefer passing out on vodka
instead of warm strawberry milk at night, a part of us still is a child,
probably always will be, and surely a part of us will always want to be one. No
just kidding referring to that last point, nobody really liked strawberry milk;
I’m going to go with chocolate milk instead.
Ok so I’m sure I am supposed to
blabber about how this end only marks a new beginning, or how successfully
ending high school only means that we have our whole lives ahead of us and a
wonderful future awaits us blah blah blah. Know, that might be true for many of
us, not necessarily inclusive here, I’m saying this without pointing any fingers,
but we all know there is always those people who will never get out of their
parents house, or those other people that are already mentally engaged in a one
party marriage and their whole life awaits for nothing but Netflix, cup a
noodles, and beer. Then again, there are those people we all secretly hate
because they got in the IVY leagues, to which we never really even considered
on applying, instead we are just here, hoping to get accepted to some small
community college majoring in some coerced almost made up study. So probably
what I’m trying to say is that although your time of taking care of your kids
is almost over, parents, don’t get over exited yet, probably don’t get exited
ever, there is no real proof we are ever leaving you guys, even if we get
married, just embrace the deed we are in fact unfinished and you will have to
deal with us until we are finished, if we will ever be. But don’t worry I guess
we will get there. Well, who will ever know, I guess nobody ever is finished
right? Good luck.
I guess I’m supposed to say some
more stuff that would inspire all of you guys, like that inspirational dude
that talks in speeches and is really good at doing so, and actually gets
through to most of the people, who by the time the dude is done talking they
open their minds to incredibly inspiring ideas for their future, which
unfortunately eventually just disappear. So well I don’t know much
inspirational talk, I will say this: if you want to succeed in life, in your
future you have to be your own g-d damn self, stop copying people and embrace
who you are. Also terminate completely that thought in which you are the best,
because you are not, and out there in actual life you are nobody, literally
nobody, except of course if you end up having a life breaking experience and
end up becoming that inspirational dude who makes inspirational speeches, then
congrats on that. To end this here, because I know how boring listening to
other people talk is, and I know how hungry we all are, I will say this:
congrats on finally graduating, on surviving our senior year with all but liberty,
and for not killing each other, because we all know that secretly we can’t
stand being around each other for more time. Good luck to all of you and I am
really looking forward to that ten year reunion, we all know who will arrive in
a pink helicopter, who will arrive in a white glittered limo, and who will
actually bike their way to the reunion see you soon, or not.
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